How To Avoid Violence In Marriage

violence in marriage is dangerious and devilish

In modern marriages today violence is dominant. Misunderstanding will certainly arise sometimes but there should not be violence in any form neither minor nor major. Homes should be peaceful and harmonious. The question is how do we then get there? No matter the sacrifice you have to pay so you can avoid violence it is worth it.

Tips to avoid violence in the marriage home

(1)    Have love and respect for each other

(2)    Avoid hurtful speech

(3)    Don’t let the love die

(4)    Have self control

(5)    Be positive about your marriage                              

(6)    Pray together

(7)    Eliminate pride completely

(8)    Show concern

(9)    Accept his or her people

(10) Plan together

(11) Don’t keep secrete

(12) Be intimate

Have love and respect for each other

To the men

 love your wife as Christ love the church, don’t treat her like nobody remember that she is now part of you, I mean you both are one. Always let her know the way you feel about her, any time she changes her hair do please do commend her that she is beautiful, appreciate her food and the time she is spending to take care of the home and the children. Let her know that she is a super mum.

To the woman

respect your husband, be very submissive and don’t take the role as a man in the house, let him feel the responsibility of being the head of the home. Respect his strength and weakness and be someone he can easily talk too. Try not to argue even if you think his points are not good enough. See your husband as a super man because the way you respect him will go a long way in affecting the way other people will treat him. Attend seminars, functions, read good books on building happy home.

Avoid hurtful speech

Try to avoid any speech that is insulting, always express your feelings with love and don’t attack your spouse with hurtful statement. If you must correct please do it in such away that your partner will not get hurt, always put yourself in their position because this will help you to take decisions on what action to take. Any time you are faced with challenges try and settle it amicably don’t take any issue over the next day. Know your spouse and know the best time to communicate issues, don’t bring out wrongs when your partner is over stressed. Help your spouse to over come weaknesses, praise your spouse even when he does not deserve it.

Don’t let the love die

Love is the greatest ingredient that can sustain a home. Love each other as if you will wake up without seeing each other again. Don’t stop those attitudes that attracted you to your partner. Don’t allow anything come in-between the love you have for each other not even your children, create time for your self and be lively when you are together. Add verities to your marriage by exchanging gift, cooking together, bathing together and playing game. Remember birthday celebrations, wedding anniversaries and also write love letter to your partner.

Have self control

Have self control over the way you react to issues, always try to control your reaction when you get offended. Don’t over react to things, because you might end up using weapons. Tell your partners where he or she is wrong and let her know that you are not happy. Do think of the end result of your actions before reacting. Learn to walk away if you think the issue is getting out of hand and for peace to rain learn to play the fool. Everybody plays the fool no exception to the rule.

Be positive about your marriage

Don’t always bring up wrong event that has happened in the past, just let if go. Be happy all the time and don’t get irritated over your partner. Say positive things about your marriage. Call your partner when he or she is not close, talk about the qualities that attracted you to her.

Don’t ever discuss your marital issue to friends because they might give you wrong counsel; avoid comparing your marriage with another marriage. Always believe that you both can build a strong and healthy family.

Pray together

 A family that prays together stays together, everything answers to prayer. Talk God about what you don’t like in your spouse and what you want in them.

Eliminate pride completely

You cannot give away your heart to another if you are proud, come down for each other, learn how to say sorry even if you are not the one that is wrong, if sorry is not enough get on your knees for your love if it will make them happy. Don’t hide your feelings for each other. If you win the argument you can’t win their love, so what is the use? What do you stand to gain if they are wrong and you are correct?

Show concern

Show concern especially when the person is depressed and hurt or not healthy. Don’t ignore your partner’s state of mind.

Accept his or her people

The easiest way to win the heart of your partner is taking his or her people as yours. Don’t dislike his or her parents or siblings, try to send gift and call sometimes. Don’t talk your partner into hating their parents, when they visit welcome them with love, when they want to spend some days don’t get offended but just adjust a little for the period of time they will stay.

Plan together

Don’t do anything without your partner knowing. As a wife don’t spend your salary without telling your husband and as a husband, you should not start a project without letting your wife know because if she gets to know from other sources you might not find it easy with her.

Don’t keep secrete

Being secretive will only tear your home apart, when they find out the secret, they will feel disappointed and that may lead to distrust. You don’t want to lose the trust of your spouse. Relate in truth one to another. If you keep secrets then be sure you have kept made room for violence.

Be intimate

Create intimacy; your spouse should be your best friend. To create intimacy is simple; have and do things in common; eat together, play together, attend functions together, if you want to be early to somewhere let it be the effort of the both of you and taking care of the children and the home should be the responsibility of both partners.